What Should I do?

By Tith Chandara 

I want to enjoy my favorite stuffs, but while I am working on it, I feel that it’s not so interesting for me and I can’t entirely enjoy it. 

This year the Department of Media and Communication (DMC) selected me with four other classmates of mine to do internship abroad under the support from the Konrad Adenauer Foundation. Now, I am working for CARE-Germany in the Press office where I like very much and where I wish to work. 

I like Germany. Germany is a very nice place for me to live. Since living here, I have known 

Some of the press officers of CARE are watching my video documentary I shown them. CARE has a very good office and comfortable to work. All the staff are friendly and helpful. I like my work there and the environment there, but how can I find it more interesting to me? Photo: Tith Chandara

 and understood a lot from it. However, I encountered some problems while I am working here. 

How can I enjoy my work? 

“In fact, I really really love working in the press office of CARE-Germany during my summer internship.” I like writing, I like reporting (on the CARE’s blog) and I like the working environment in the office. Everybody in the office is friendly and helpful. I found my improvement, but I don’t enjoy it very much. I don’t know why I got bored with those stuffs sometimes. 

I got a feeling that “I am not good, I’m not good” all the time and very worry of what I am doing while I think my works are not satisfied. I afraid that when I go back to Cambodia, I cannot mark the DMC and worry to be the one destroying the school’s reputation or else I might get negative criticism from my school mates. This feeling always stuck in my mind every minute. 

What I found not interesting to me is the work seems to be again and again. Besides reading and writing in English, I cannot do more. Another thing, I am not yet specialized in the field of my work. I am so young in “Humanitarian works” because I haven’t yet involved in-depth in the field. Most of the time I didn’t know where and what to start. “I have to read and read and read everyday.  “But OK!!! This is the time for me to learn.” 

I am sponsored to intern here in Germany; it’s a long journey, it’s a costly trip; I shouldn’t make my sponsors and people at school disappointed with me. I have to improve my knowledge in the international stage, making myself, my class, my generation, my school and my country marked. 

Be Polite or Serious? 

I don’t know what kind of person I am. I always please people and don’t want to see them so busy because of me and my work. I want to do things by myself first before letting the otheres to help. Am I  polite? 

In Germany, I got many suggestions not to be so polite. Some of my colleague said to me that 

I was offered a chance to an international conference in Bonn where there were many participants from different countries. A man at the conference told me that I am so polite. I should not be so polite and be polite in the right way. Photo: Tith Chandara

 being polite is important; it doesn’t mean that you (me) have to be polite all the time. You (me) have to make clear of what you (me) are thinking of and try to show up and convince people about your (my) ideas. 

OK! Now I am trying to be tougher with what I am doing. I have to throw away some of the politeness and making myself stronger. I should stand to be a strong man. What I should do now is to enjoy working and make my stuff more joyful though I got bored with those stuffs sometimes. 

Feeling of Fail 

“People cannot produce good products with the stuffs they found boring to them, “said I. 

This is a very wonderful chance for me to explore and working in the real working environment abroad. 

But, for now, I feel that I am not yet, good enough to work toward my career. 

I am not alone, few friends talked to me about thier internship, and they discovered the same problem. For that, I know what to do next.

“Personally, I like working with creative stuff and something new.” Every night in Germany, I gather all of my photos in my hard-drive and select some of them to make some designs. It helps me both: to improve my favorite skill in creative design and multimedia and also to make my brain runs and increased my ability to what I prefer for the thesis. 

For this, I will ask not only working on writing and reading, but also help the office in other press works so that I can combine all works together. Try to speak out and change my habit of “being silent” to talk more and more.

Actually, I am not a careless man. (Please give me a feedback if I am) But; sometimes, when people get bored with something we don’t like, they might just let it be so that the result is not good. 

I want my work more joyful and really want to be a good intern for this summer. I’m trying to work hard and work smart every day, but how can I enjoy it more. I don’t want to hear bad criticism when I finish my internship. What should I do?